Nightlife has always felt like the downfall of my lifestyle.

In my world, the only time nightlife ever had a place or made sense was when I lived in Las Vegas, working in nightclubs and earning a living through it. My love for daylight, mornings, deep sleep, and energized training sessions has always clashed with nightlife – the two could hardly ever coexist.

But the past weekends shed a light on something.

Admittedly, I spend a lot of time home. I love when my sleep is consistent (8-9 hrs at least), I love to eat home and I love silence (I believe to have a very sensitive hearing, my friends make fun of me because as soon as I walk into a noisy place, I ran to the bathroom and grab some paper to stuck it in my hears). We are what we do repeatedly and it’s easy to decide that because you don’t usually do something, it doesn’t belong to your persona, but that’s a detrimental mindset.

In my age range, I’m also discovering people are at crossroads: some have given up the night hours and rather go to 5 pm dinners. Some are in the “extremely healthy phase”, where going out is too much temptation (food, drinks) so they rather stay completely out of it. Some are too busy with kids or family chores to even bother. Some are “still doing it” – but not in the way it appeals to me: going out no matter what, drinking no matter what, staying up late no matter what. Some (like me) are the “it gotta be worth it” type of people. We might come with too much judgement though ahah: what kind of people are there? What kind of music is there? How far is this place? If the shoe fits… alright we on them streets – and we might even stretch it to a drink or two.

A few weeks ago, I felt the dread building up.

I’ve been home during the weekend for months. I could not handle another Netflix night or horrible murder trial cases I get very invested in watching on Youtube. I remembered this quote: “sometimes the only way to stay sane is to go a little crazy“.

My little crazy was putting on a dress, some heels, and say yes to a 8:30 pm dinner ahah. Jokes aside, it wasn’t just about that, it was about softening my structure, allowing some room for something different to unfold, not worrying about what time I’d go sleep, if I’d I miss training the next day or if I’d eat enough protein. Because truthfully, I don’t want to wake up one day and think, damn, I wish I’d lived more fully.

Don’t get me wrong, you can have a beautiful life and never stay up past 10 pm. But sometimes it’s about having the ability to break free from what you lovingly built – because life has a way to surprise you when you relinquish the need to curate every detail of your day and night – and the night possess unquestionably a certain energy. Allow some mystery to come in, walk into a part of your 24 hrs you usually don’t, not knowing what’s there. Sometimes your reaction will be “well, I’m not missing out”, other times will be “this is the most fun I had in the past 10 years” lol. It only takes one decision: step out of what’s known and predictable.

And so I’ve had some fun nights out lately, unexpected, playful – waking up the next day tired and yet happy, with a relaxed mind and sometimes juicy stories to go over brunch with girlfriends (isn’t that the best part?). If routine is my foundation, exception and novelty is my reminder that life is meant to be lived, not just optimized.

I hope you can find that middle ground – knowing your routine is so strong, letting it bend a little won’t break it.

Till next time.